You want jokes.... OK

An employee phones his boss one day, to tell him he wont be in to work.



employee - "Hi, Just phoning to tell you I wont be in work today"

Boss - "why not"

employee - "im not feeling well, under the weather"

Boss - "oh I see, well you know what I do when im under the weather"

employee - "No what"

Boss - "well I have fun with my wife.. it always makes me feel better"

employee - "Oh ok"



he hangs up.. 1 hour later, he turns up at work.



Boss - "what you doing here, I thought you were ill"

employee - "I took your advice, I feel much better"

Boss - "oh good, I told you didn't I.. ok get back to work"



the employee heads off in the opposite direction, stops turns around and says



employee - "By the way, you have a nice house"





Hope its not too bad